ST. LOUIS — The majority of Americans deal with stress in their everyday lives. Where we each carry it, and how our bodies react, is different. In some cases, it impacts our bodies in ways we may not even recognize. This morning Five On Your Side helps you target what stresses you out and how to manage it, so it doesn't manage you.
Being a full-time graduate student and working as a grad assistant is no breeze. 22-year-old Allie Lehr has a lot on her plate at Saint Louis University.
"I wake up and I’m like I have 500 million things to do Today and there is no way I’m going to get them all done," she said.
But this stress is not new for her.
"I remember when I was a kid my dad would always massage my shoulders because they would go up like this," she described.
It wasn't until Lehr began having stomach issues that she realized something was really wrong.
Lehr explained, "I think it was my junior year of college I started getting severe stomach aches I couldn't go to class, I couldn’t leave my bed, it was horrible."
Lehr was diagnosed with anxiety and IBS brought on by stress.
"Realizing that stress is what triggered it made me less stressed and I started to be able to manage them," she said.
Lehr is not alone. A recent Gallup poll found 79 percent of Americans deal with stress in their everyday lives.
Therapist Carly Sparks, of KINETIC Counseling in St. Louis, has been practicing for 13 years.
"None of us are totally immune to stress, and you know what, that's really a good thing," she explained.
Sparks says our bodies physiological response to stress like increased heart rate, muscle tension, headaches or stomach aches, is nature's way of protecting us. A kind of warning that something is making us uncomfortable.
"The problem is when we're dealing with these things for too long and our body doesn't get a break," she explained.
The key, Sparks says, is recognizing what factors in your life stress you out and learning what calms you down.
Stress used to control Lehr.
"I guess just kind of acceptance and not being so hard on myself has been the biggest help," she said.
Going to therapy taught her how to take control of it. She now accepts she can’t do everything and that giving 100 percent all the time is not always plausible. Lehr has also found what helps her relax.
"I really like yoga. My dog she's the biggest stress relief and just talking to friends," she said.
It's why she's studying to become a family therapist to help others like herself.
Lehr said, "just because you’re scared, just because you’re stressed, just because you’re overwhelmed, you’re not broken. It’s normal and there are ways to cope with it."
Here are some tips from Carly Sparks on how you can hone in on your stress:
- Do not ignore your stress. In order to discharge the feelings of stress, do a body scan. Start and your head and go all the way to your toes asking yourself where am I tense or where does it hurt. This helps you to loosen up.
- Take stock of what’s stressing you out. Make two columns. One you can control and one that is out of your control. Look at the “out of my control” column and change your perspective of these things.
- Deep breathing is something anyone can do at work or in the car. Breathe in for 5 seconds, hold for 3, exhale for 8.
- Walking away and taking a walk from whatever may be stressing you out.
- Exercising is a huge stress relief.
- Massage therapy can also help.
If you’ve done these things and you still find yourself struggling with managing your stress, you may need to talk to a therapist.
