ST. LOUIS - As we continue our safer living now series, we examine something that too often gets over looked; our mental health.
Especially in our children. We're so focused on looking down, we forget to look up.
"It’s so easy to miss your kids cry for help," explained teen counselor Michelle Manuel.
There are many teens who need our help. The Centers for Disease Control estimates half of teens between the ages of 13 and 18 show signs of mental health issues.
"This is my kind of wall of wonder," said Manuel as she pointed to a wall full of books, games and stuffed animals.
Manuel talks to teens everyday who are dealing with issues of self-worth, depression, even suicide.
Her office is where she teaches kids how to have face to face interaction and to understand their feelings.
"I wonder how long it takes for you to calm down after having a meltdown," she explained as she held up a timer.
These life skills are severely lacking in our teens Today and Manuel says smartphones and social media are to blame.
"Our conversations are text messages. So, if you don't hold my attention for more than two seconds you're never going to build a relationship which scares me about mental health nowadays because kids aren't having those deep long conversations," she explained.
Without those meaningful relationships, teens look online.
"We have 24-hour access to knowing you’re never going to look like that, so you must not be worth it," she explained.
Manuel knows what that feels like. She left a job as a school counselor after she says her colleagues excluded her and made her feel small.
She said, "If as an adult, and I’m good at what I do, I start to question myself. Imagine what a teenager will feel like or will do when somebody tells them that they're not good enough."
Often a teens world will feel like it’s crashing down if they face rejection or bullying online. Parents play a crucial role in all of this. They can act as the referee between their child and what they’re consuming on their smartphones.
"Teaching them how to be human, because I feel like we've forgotten how to be human," she said.
For starters, Manuel says have a conversation.
"Show them what it’s like to have a meal without media," she explained.
When you go get your child’s attention, ask questions. Find out what’s going on in their lives. If they push back, press harder.
"Probe, prod, give them a chance to share," she exclaimed.
Take the time to talk or you won't know if your child is hiding something serious behind their screens.
"Unplug, and then plug into your life, we have to," explained Manuel.
If you’ve tried to talk to your teen and they’re still acting up or feeling depressed, Manuel suggests seeking help. They may need to talk to a professional to target and treat their mental health issues.
